


Bed Sheets

by Daisyith



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Drinking, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 06:46:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15091292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daisyith/pseuds/Daisyith
Summary: Nico can’t sleep in his own bed, the sheets still smell like Lewis.





	Bed Sheets

Sat looking out of the window, Nico followed a fat drop of rain as it travelled down the pane of glass. Heavy droplets pattered against the window: a constant drumming sound. Huge shadows were cast over the floor, elongated with the late hour. 

He didn’t know how long he had been sat there: the sky had darkened to a near black. Goosebumps covered his arms, but Nico didn’t care. He lifted the bottle to his mouth, the glass sticky with condensation. The amber liquid filled his mouth, burning at his throat. It did a little to combat the cold temperatures. 

Images swirled inside his head, haunting his every memory. He didn’t know what was real anymore. What had happened? And what had his twisted memory conjured? 

It felt like a lifetime ago that it had happened. Every night since, he’d been too scared to climb beneath his bedsheets. He knew the sharp scent of that aftershave still lingered on the material: once a comforting smell, now tugged at his heartstrings. Every time, he stepped through the doorway, each memory came flooding back. He thought about the first night they’d spent together: talking for hours before finally falling asleep, a tangle of limbs. He recalled the way he ran his fingers through short, black hair, the other releasing a moan of satisfaction. He remembered taking care of the other man, hidden beneath a swaddle of blankets and tissues. They’d had it all in that bed: the good and the bad.

It had been there, beneath the sheets, that Lewis had finally had enough. Late at night, he confessed the truth: he couldn’t do it anymore. The never seeing each other anymore, the constant bickering. He thought he deserved better, that someone else could give him that. Nico thought differently. Tears had filled his eyes, bubbling over his lashes. He had turned, not wanting the other to see. Still and unmoving, Nico waited in silence until the Englishman had left the room before huge, ugly sobs escaped from parted lips. Not saying goodbye was the hardest thing he’d done.

That memory, of feeling all alone, flooded back every time he glanced towards the plush mattress. He longed for a good nights sleep but couldn’t bring himself to even touch the pale blue sheets. 

Instead, he spent countless hours in a state of drunken numbness; empty bottles surrounding him. He couldn’t cope without the alcohol glaze around him, lessening the heartache slightly. Letting Lewis leave was the biggest mistake of his life.

He lifted his bottle again, shaking it until the last few drops spilt onto his tongue. With the four walls swirling into a blur of colour, he could finally relax, finally smile. Yesterday, his friend visited. They’d taken one look at Nico’s purple, sunken eyes and unkempt beard before taking him into their arms. They whispered two words of advice,

“Call him.”

Now, with the liquid confidence coursing through his body, his fingers didn’t shake as he dialled the number. Surprisingly, three rings in, Lewis answered,

“Nico? It’s late, is everything alright?” He asked, his voice laced with sleep. It was only then that Nico remembered the dark skies and hidden sun. Hearing the soft English voice again filled Nico with warmth.

“Letting you walk out the door was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. I haven’t been able to sleep in that bed since you left. Or sleep at all. I miss you.” As Nico finished his sentence, he was overwhelmed with regret. What had he just done? This was possibly even stupider than letting Lewis leave! 

A moment of silence passed between the two, “Nico...” Lewis began.

“Forget it, I’m sorry.” Nico interrupted, he could feel a red warmth creep over his cheeks.

Lewis sighed softly, “Are you ok?” 

“I just want to know, why? Was I not good enough?” He mumbled, voice barely above a whisper.

“Of course you were. I was stupid, I thought there was someone better suited to me. I didn’t want to say anything, I thought you were moving on but I was wrong...”

Silence. Nico wasn’t sure if he’d heard that correctly, “You... You were wr- wrong?” He stumbled over the words, desperate to know the answer.

Lewis nodded, before remembering Nico couldn’t see him, “Yeah... I was stupid to throw it all away Nico. I loved you, I still do.”

Nico took a shaky breath, desperately trying to hold back the tears that were forming in his eyes, “I love you too. It’s been horrible without you.”

“Are you at home? I’ll be there in 10.” 

For the next 10 minutes, Nico couldn’t sit still. His leg wobbled, his heart pounded. He didn’t know what to expect. What was going to happen?

When there was a knock on the wooden door, Nico scanned his eyes around the room. There were a lot of empty bottles. Too many. But it was too late to do anything about them now. Cautiously, he opened the door to let Lewis inside. 

Taking in the purple shadows beneath his eyes, the remnants of a night’s drinking and the pale skin of his face, Lewis stepped forwards and wrapped his arms around the German,

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” He whispered repeatedly into the blonde locks of hair.

They stayed like that for a while, neither man wanting to break the contact. Eventually, Lewis steered them into the bedroom, under the bed sheets. For the first time in nearly four weeks, Nico slept soundlessly, a content smile on his face.


End file.
